Monday, February 21, 2011

A Day in the Life of Early Dementia (A Dementia Story of Love Series)

Mom, Dad and Marijo 2000

( I will eventually be posting a series of pieces about dementia and my parents through the eyes of this RN who was their daughter - those having family members with dementia will relate I am sure!)

This day was before the family realized the extent on Mom’s dementia.  Yes, she wanted to MOVE rather than face issues and get things straightened out.  Yes, she was sometimes irrational (but she according to her MD she was bi-polar and couldn’t take the meds most of her adult life so we never knew what to attribute to what) Yes, she was thinking many people were out to get her.  But neither we nor the nursing staff had realized to what extent her dementia was affecting her thought processes at this point.

Mom left a phone message, she’s had it where she is living with Dad in a wonderful assisted living facility. She called a local moving company and was going to another facility all the way across town (she doesn’t drive and never has since rolling her boyfriend’s car at age 18) AND she wants to move Dad back to another facility he used to be in. She hung up on me when I was trying logic and scripture with her.

Help me, Lord, to honor my parents yet BACK OFF and wait. Speak to Mom, Lord and encourage Dad.

 My sister, Colette, in Iowa (better perspective from a distance for sure) had marvelous insights: me logical and Mom emotion driven but she can sure get me hooked.

Ahh, Lord God Thou hast made the heavens and the earth with thy great power, nothing is too difficult for Thee – can You speak to my mom and have her hear and obey? Give me wisdom and strength!

 I talked with Dad, he agreed that he was getting great care where he was and he did not want to move again (Mom had moved them around 10 times in two years – sometimes together and sometimes in separate facilities)

Thank You, Lord, for an excellent talk with my excellent Dad! Bless him. Please speak to Mom.

"Honor your father and your mother so that you will live a long time in the land that the Lord your God is going to give you.(NIV)
honor your father and mother; and love your neighbor as you love yourself. (NIV)

The command says, "Honor your father and mother." This is the first command that has a promise with it— (NIV)
(C) Marijo Phelps all rights reserved. Use with proper credits.


lioneagle said...

Hi Marijo -

I really like that photo of you and your parents.

Marijo (Mary Jo) Phelps said...

Thanks Sandra - Dad used to be my height (5'8") but when this photo was taken I think he was under 100#. Mom wore a size 4 dress right before she went to be with the Lord....and they ate dessert with every meal - my sister and I are still wondering what happened to us.